Tuesday, March 3, 2009

The $50 Flush

Ever have one of those days? You know, the kind where you think it's started off well, everyone is bright and chipper and then something smacks you unawares.



It started off well. Hubs ran an errand. The girls and I ate breakfast and I hit the shower.

Every mom with only 1 bathroom knows that when you are in the shower, the whole world decides it needs to pee. When I got out of the shower I noticed that the lid was up, and the toilet was unflushed. No problem. I reached over pushed down the handle and reached for my deodorant.

Let me pause here to say that if you ever get the impression to do something: DO IT!

Because I had the impression, right before I pressed down the handle, to shut the lid. I always shut the lid when I flush. I always shut the lid when I've showered. Why didn't I shut the lid?

My fingers fumbled. The deodorant fell into the icky, flushing potty.

I screamed.

I gaped at the horror.

And then I lept into action. Hands wash! Toilets clog! REACH IN!!!!!!

I did but not quickly enough. No. My lovely almost new deodorant slipped from my fingers and went down into the abyss that is the toilet. Gone.

Here's where I should probably interject that this has happened before. About 8 years ago. Which is when I learned to always put down the toilet lid before I flush and when I take a shower. Always. Except I think yesterday.

Hubs came in, unshaken. He sprung into quick action. First he donned my dishwashing gloves, pretty and pink and also nearly new. Then he tried first to reach it. No luck. The toilet, she's a gonna have to come off.

Oh, he was good. No yelling. No complaining. No lectures. The bolts that held it in place were rusted and so we had to head off to the plumbing supply store for new bolts and a seal and a mini hacksaw. No problem.

Ten minutes later we have the toilet removed and the stinky hole in the floor revealed. The deodorant is removed and the only thing left to do it replace the seal and bolts and put it all back together. Easy right?

Wrong. The seal went on fine. The bolts went in fine. The toilet went on fine. But when it came time to tighten the bolts thing were not so fine. Something was wrong. One of the bolts kept coming loose. I said it was stripped and causing it to turn. Hubs disagreed and took the whole thing apart, reinserted the bolt, put the toilet back on, and guess what? Same thing.

By this time he was not feeling quite so pleasant.

Did I mention he had not eaten yet? Despite the fact it was sitting on the table waiting for him to dig in?

Finally 3 trips to the hardware store and hours later the toilet is on. It is fastened and everything is in working order. The bathroom was also trashed. Rust marks, sticky waxy toilet seal residue. Oh, the horror.

For the 20th time that day (which was around 4 o'clock) I tell Hubs to eat. I would clean up the mess, and then we could go do the the things on his to-do list.(which involved test driving a car...don't get me started...)

As I'm cleaning up I see a drip. Followed by another. and yet another. The tank...she's a leakin'.

No! exclaimed Hubs. That's just condensation.

And finally the fight Hubs had been spoiling for over the past week ensues ( I forgot to mention that part.)

Oh yes it did. I had not allowed myself to be engaged in his grumpiness for months. Months. I was doing well. But that drip was the drip that sent this Momma over the edge.

We fougnt. I cleaned. The kids went outside. I changed. I got in the car. And nobody felt like going anywhere. The to do list? gone. Who cared.

It all eventually worked out. Hubs got a few hotdogs, we shopped for some books, hit the mall and made it home. Only to find.....


and being right? highly over rated!

And guess what? at 9 o'clock- There's no where to buy the parts. And this morning? Hubs left for his job. I'm left with a leaking john, 2 kids that just have to pee, a trip to the hardware store, and lots of wet towels.

Grand total? Around $50. and a very frustrated Momma.